a conclusion

i have come to a conclusion... well i probably came to this conclusion a long time ago. ask any ex boyfriend, ex friend, or take a look at any argument i have had with an angry mom or dad. I am not a good communicator. i'm sure you may think "this is strange, how can she have a blog?"...but maybe that is why it is slightly ironic. i communicate much better through words, as in typing them... not speaking them. my lack of talent in this area usually leads to arguments, disagreements, frustrations, upset, sleepless nights and sometimes tears...or breaking things (rare)...but communicating with the ones i love...absolutely not a strength of mine. (unless its those awesome one liners that everyone has once in a while when trying to make their mom or best friend feel better or in an effort to cheer up an old friend or loved one - inspirational tid bits if you will --in which case i normally just steal words of wisdom from my mom mom, so don't give me too much credit)


i usually have full and wonderful intentions of having an educated enlightening conversation... it is through these conversations that i look forward to growing my relationship with that individual... really having some great heart to hearts, or at least laughing about something silly that i decided to bring up and discuss.  and well, it usually takes a turn for the worst whether through a disagreement or a lack of ability to correctly phrase what i want to say. i need to be able to speak more eloquently, (similarly to my boyfriend..who by the way comes up with the most absurd analogies in the middle of an argument or in depth conversation...seriously people, these things are absolutely crazy.. even crazier, they normally make 100% sense) i'll try and take a lesson and get back to you on how it works almost every time (although it has been 2 years and i am no closer to understanding how he does it than i was the first night we met - cheers to that) anyway...i look for some sort of recommendation. what do i need to do better? i have taken the approach to laugh things off, or try/pretend to not have this bother me..that usually fails..so i am left either feeling beaten down, or totally disgruntled that i am unable to be on the same page with the individual i wanted to have a conversation with in the first place. i know this may seem crazy for some, those of you out there who have breezy conversations with everyone they meet, or hell even those marketers out there who are natural people persons. crazy thing about this, i am one of those marketers who considers them selves people friendly... loves talking to people and meeting and learning more as each day goes on.. sure some people may mistake me for being slightly sarcastic(bitchy) or intimidating (bitchy)...but i swear, i don't mean it! give a girl a chance will ya? 


in the meantime any words of advice on how to argue less, see the brighter side more often or take a sip of serendipity would be nice... because i swear, believe it or not, i mean well. 

i look up communication and i find this... serendipity?