When I stop and think about it, 31 years is a very long time and as i type this with a new sparkly diamond on my left hand, i can't say that I'm not impressed. After 6 years of dating, Joe and I are about to 'start all over' and as exciting as that is, its also a little nuts. It is nuts to think that out of any others, we have decided to commit ourselves to each other just as my parents did 31 years ago through the good times and harder yet, the knock down, drag out bad times. I am not the authority on relationships or marriages, however I do know that as I am about to embark on my own personal marriage journey, I have to give thanks to the two who through their own love story, taught me what a marriage is all about.
Just like many, my parents have absolutely fought, they have yelled, they have shed tears and I can bet that they may have wanted to walk away from it all on more than a one occasion but... they never did. And on the flip side, I've seen my parents experience loss, laugh like hell and continue to grow as a couple every single year. My parents have been married for a long time, and have also by my age, already had me. Hell, it seems like most parents back then while still trying to figure out who they were as individuals, where also now responsible for molding a new family too and if that isn't pressure, i don't know what is.
Thankfully, I have childhood memories that i will always cherish and i completely contribute to my parents. Holiday traditions, birthdays, after school snacks, family dinners, bath time, soccer games, weekend shenanigans with family friends and everything in between would not be the same if it weren't for my mom and dad working their asses off behind the scenes. As i get older, I can appreciate how much work it must have been to have dinners prepared, pay the bills on time, make sure the house is clean and on top of all of that, not want to take out all life's frustrations on the other person who's simply just trying to make it work too.
My parents have made it clear that they are a team. my dad is fiercely supportive of my mom and my mom bends over backwards to make it all just work for my dad, no matter what her own personal views on something may be. they love each other unconditionally, yet still allow the other to be true to themselves. They know what makes the other tick, and after 31 years, I've found that sometimes that could actually get tougher with time instead of easier.
i could pull up video hundreds tapes of my brother and I growing up and see the two people, my age, in the background smiling or laughing with the other, creating memories that I'm sure they will cherish for a lifetime. as life goes on and we all grow up, the fact that my parents are still there supporting one another, laughing and experiencing all that this life has to offer together is completely inspiring.
There's a quote that i recently stumbled upon that read "i want a marriage more beautiful than my wedding" and it has never meant more than it does today. As we work through hectic planning and exciting deadlines, i realize that it is more important than ever to build a marriage, not just a special day, and it is because of the examples of the people behind us that make that possible. Sure, no one says it will be easy, in fact, most will probably tell us that it's going to be hard but if my parents can keep it together for 31 years, and make it look that good...i am pretty damn excited for what is yet to come.
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