Manic Monday

Just another manic monday right?

sure, there are ups and there are certainly downs..because well, that's just how mondays are...and shortly after the blog post i'll be ready to say goodnight. one day down and one day closer to my wonderful weekend with momma..

but, the real reason to share is pretty simple...

almost two and a half years ago Joe picked me up from the airport. I was a senior in college and he was working at the center. it was long distance bliss. we had seen each other ever so often and when visits occurred, vacation wasn't ever really n e e d e d like it can be now a days. so anyway...winter break, i think? and it was a bumpy flight. Cola to ATL, ATL to PHL.. probably after a long layover or delay, because honestly, that's always my luck. i think i hopped off the plane in a thin long sleeve, jeans and flops. simply forgetting the fact that dorothy wasn't in kansas anymore...wait wait, i mean.. it wasn't 70 and sunny, and i wasn't in Cola any more. no, no... it was frigid and i could absolutely see my breath. although...i don't remember being all that cold, because well...i was about to jump off the plane and hop in a warm car, with an even warmer heart.

the pick up was sweet. simple, but sweet. and then came the hour and 10 minute (exactly) drive home... around Mcdade Blvd he reached behind my seat... i absolutely thought nothing of it... and to my surprise, a gift! an understated simple back box with a thin ribbon... very sexy wrapping if i do say so myself. i remember looking up and over at him and thinking, what in the hell!? this has absolutely NEVER happened before. shit, i got surprise gifts from my mom every once in a while, or a love filled note from my best friend..but a gift, from a boy, for nothing. i was instantly intrigued. slyly smirking i un-tied the ribbon, pulled open the tissue and to my surprise a cashmere sweater...yes, beautiful even though to this day i'm sure he thinks i thought otherwise...but, that wasn't the best part...

on the side was a little box. it was black. small white lettering with an emblem. a BR for Banana Republic... interested i slid open the case. a candle... now, here is the greatest part. that candle lasted me through college, through moving home, and through two years on my own. its scent was intoxicating, one that i have never ever been able to find again... it smelled like our relationship (in a symbolic way of course if you get what i am saying..) you see, it smelled like him and i in one...sure, sounds nuts but it was earthy yet scintillating and in that moment... it was the best moment i had ever shared with him, and quite honestly..ever have. it's the little things and on that note it was a beautiful start to a wonderful break.

so today, on this manic monday i stopped by target to grab some dinner.. well, because it was a total ben and jerry's pizza and a solo movie kind of night. on my way out i stopped by the decor (in typical sara fashion) and stumbled upon a candle...sure, not THE candle...but the exact. same. scent. i purchased it immediately. i bought it simply because it smelled just like that car ride home years back... and that is a perfect memory to hold on too if you ask me.

Black Orchid and Amber - Target

hypothetical

hypothetical. got it?

what makes you feel safe? you know, what makes you feel secure with who you are, what you do and how far you have come? is it your salary or your families praises? what about the boyfriend you have been with since the beginning of time or is it the hairdresser you have been going to because, well, you're a control freak and going somewhere else would be nuts. what about your job, is that what makes you feel safe?

there are so many variables in ones life that we have little to no control over, and it comes to down either trusting that what you have is good...enough. or, taking a leap of faith on just about, nothing that may be better. would it be smart to continue with the challenges you face on a daily basis and the questions that you have when you go to bed every night or.. is it taking a risk in the unknown, because with risk...comes reward. see example a.
example a;
work for the company you have been in order to meet ends meet, pay the bills and make sure that you are following through with what you had set out to do in college. ya know, what is expected of you. sure, you might be better off doing something else...but having the right amount of money in your pocket, the tasks that you are comfortable with and the policies that you can manage seem right. not to mention, that a jump of well, anything else would be...crazy. and by who's standards? your own. slightly ironic right?

and honestly, all of this is kind of funny to me.. i tend to admire those who marry young, are carefree, and who move at the drop of a "will you follow me?" I admire the availability, the open-ness and the drive. not the drive like i have..ya know to be successful, pay my bills, make my parents proud and support..well whoever and whatever i choose. but, the d r i v e to set out to do something different and to chase what is actually important. family, friends, love, laughter, memories made and aspirations. so at what age is it okay, and well acceptable to do such things... not be so safe, and well.. slip down a slippery slope, because well ...you've tried everything else on and it didn't fit just right? at what moment can you wake up, look up to the ceiling and realize you might not have it all figured out..but, you have the safe on your right, a window and sunshine on your left and an open agenda ahead. inciting if you ask me...but, then again, hypothetical at best.

southern comfort food

so there is this tumblr account that i stalk..http://throughhumbleeyes.tumblr.com and well, i am obsessed.

yes, i am from PA, but...my heart belongs in the south. after my first semester in SC i knew it was heaven on earth. exactly where i wanted to be. not just then, but now and tomorrow. the trees, the sway, the breeze. the people the style and of course the smiles. now... i am not kidding when i say this but it is an absolute love affair.

there is something about how the trees look, the brick glows and the white columns pop. there is something about how the food taste, the people pray and the alcohol stings. there is something about the friendships you make, the groups you can join and the efforts made ... all absolutely effortless.

i want to be there. SC... Charleston, Columbia and everywhere in between. sure, some people tell me.. "its different. you went to school there so it was fun, there was parities and people", but let me tell ya... they're wrong.   its just one of those things that hits you in life that makes you know exactly where you want to be and what you want to do. sure, not knowing all of those things all so clearly can be hectic, but at the option of living in sunny Charleston...i'd be happy living in a box. no seriously, a box. you put me on the battery, and hell...i'd sleep on a bench (well, maybe)

anyway... back to the blog. this girl...although i have never met her a day in my life is the epitome of southern. adπ, pearls and all. now, sure, with that being said.. i am a proud kappa, but as far as everything else...she has it goin' on and i love it. so in an effort to give a slight stranger shout out, and show a little southern hospitality. i give it props along with a friendly... i want to be you. i mean...who wouldn't want to be a a freshman at Carolina with a friendly boy...or two, a little tan and a hefty class and party schedule in front of you for the next four years...hell, i'd take it. so southern stranger... enjoy every fucking second. it goes fast.

solo

i have gotten good at being solo. living solo, singing solo, driving solo, cooking solo, shopping solo and sleeping solo. working for global is a lot like being in the army...sure i am not in harms way, nor am i sacrificing my life for my country..BUT, i do move a lot and i have gotten good at well, being solo. hence, army. kinda? well.. i think so anyway.

this is a recent thing of mine too.. so when people ask me where i work and what i do, i tell him "i work for a company that manages facilities... i market shows, and well..its kinda like the army."

i mean, think about it.. i have lived in a lot of places for being 23. that whole home body shit went out the window when i decided to go to SC, which is fine by me...but hell...three states in 4 years?!

 so...like i said before i have gotten good at being solo. now, what solo means when you actually have friends, actually have a boyfriend and actually have a family that misses you can be a little, uh, boring...but.. needless to say, i think it's worth it..it better be.

My favorite things to do solo are the following:
1. Take pictures
2. Hot showers followed by painting my nails (so girly i know)
3. Shop - however, i love shopping period.
4. Decorating
5. Driving with the windows down and the music LOUD
6. Reading
7. Watching SATC (figure it out)

brutal

when you think about your adolescence you think about how crazy and or ridiculous you were. well, at least i do.  you think about how you were dis-respectful to your parents you were, how you wore absolutely horrible clothing (and thought you looked good - how that is possible i still can't figure out) and the occasional relationship you had, good or bad. for me... its slightly well, scattered?

sure, plenty of boys all harmless, plenty of bad outfits, and a lot of hit or misses. regardless it made me realize when you are younger  how REAL everything seems. there wasn't a day that went by that i didn't take myself too seriously. i was wound up then, which means i am even more wound up now and i had stress then which seems absolutely ridiculous now that i think about it, and well.. relationships then, should have been easy, because now a days, well, they aren't. friendships and boyships alike. yes, boyships.

i think about my brother, totally carefree..however stressed tendencies tendencies may be an understatement.. so hell, i'll blame it on my parents... isn't that the right thing to do? he has had his lovely girlfriend for, oh, i don't know... 9 years maybe? precious right? i think so too...however, not to diminish the reality of that relationship, but for some reason i think, well i think they think that its a match made in heaven, probably just like every other HS relationship we had along the way... which brings me to my next point..

HS sweethearts do exist... example, my parents went to HS together, met, married, had a family. perfect. right? so if that is not a good example i don't know what is...but when you are out of HS, ya know... in the real world, how could you have possibly thought that it would have worked?  how could you have possibly thought THAT was what was right? i feel like in HS or even shortly thereafter your skewed. your ambitions are set too the wind, not necessarily a bad thing but none the less are well, scattered. 

so cheers to those who made it, and cheers to those who didn't because it is different strokes for different folks... and whether your 17 and head over heels, or 24 dazed and confused it's all just as real, and well.. very very relative. 

And I hope the sun shines
And it's a beautiful day
And something reminds you
You wish you had stayed
You can plan for a change in weather and time
But I never planned on you changing your mind

So I'll go sit on the floor
Wearing your clothes
All that I know is
I don't know how to be something you miss
Never thought we'd have a last kiss
Never imagined we'd end like this
Your name, forever the name on my lips

Just like our last kiss
Forever the name on my lips
Forever the name on my lips

Just like our last...

T. Swift

 

paperweight

when you get to your 20's i think most people want to have it all figured out. (now if you're in your thirties, forties or even fifties and reading... don't laugh, because chances are you may have thought the same..and well.. do you have it figured out yet?) i am one of those people. i want to know where i'll be in 3 years, 10 years let alone next year. i want to know where i'll live, and who i'll meet. i want to know if i'll be a gamecock season ticket holder, or have a condo on the beach... all things that would be nice to say are mine. but, more importantly i want to know where i'll be living, where i'll  be working, and if i will be happy. i want to know who i'll be surrounded by and at what age i can look around and say... okay, i got this thing figured out.

but....who doesn't?

i've decided a few things... there are a lot of friends who have it all figured out. have the path that they have chosen, have picked out the keys and the paint and have called it a day... i'm happy for them and slightly jealous. i have other friends, similar to myself who work work and work...now, at 24... i ask, is that what it's all about? working and just "figuring it out" along the way... sure, it seems to be the case, but that isn't all that fun when your best friends are scattered across the US, the family is 12 hours north and the boo is a plane ride away. so, what's next?

well.. i'll tell ya; a visit, a ribbon cutting, a visit, an open house, another open house, a visit, a work conference and maybe another visit if we are lucky down the road.. so shit, can a girl get some consistency? one can only hope..so to those that have it figured out with the cute condo, the dog and the decor i admire. and to the ones like myself... guess we'll just have to figure it out. all i know is that a little serendipitous hints along the way may be in order. it can be a little tiring but i assume it's all part of the game... and getting a head of myself seems to be standard.

MAM

it is my favorite time of year... maybe because i love sc, or maybe bc i love hootie. maybe because i love the company or simply because shotgunning beers on a golf course is way more fun than anywhere else...regardless i love MAM. 
by mam, i am referring to Monday After the Masters Pro Am. 


A few things:
1. It is embarrassing to have your phone ring while talking to Soni and Mark, yet alone have the ring tone be "Get Outta My Head" - Hootie. FAIL.
2. Always plan on leaving MAM with a few bruises and or cuts... this year, hip x 2, knee, and hands. perfect.
3. sleep is over rated.
4. Mich Ultra IS just that good.
5. Band members are always going to be late...even after plenty of "friendly reminder texts" while acting as publicist for the weekend... insert crazed Sara. 

here is the link: www.hootiegolf.com

and here are the pics:

my boo scotty poo..good times stud.

Mike and Mike.. good dudes, bad golfers.

Blurry, but at that point...we all were. LOVE.

yes, yes...good style, good smiles.

D.Ruck - THE bag of the hour.

Nothing sweeter than a Carolina sunrise on a Carolina course

MAM 2013, here i come!