that ache

what makes people argue? or what about bicker, you know that nagging kind? what makes people think that they are right and automatically assume that the other is in the wrong? why is it so hard to admit ones fault? or why are there things in a relationship that make you want to go back to when it was a movie? you know, that chick flick kind. the time when you could stay up all night and talk? (does that even happen?) but then again... do we ever not want all of these things until the time? pretty needy if you ask me. sure the dates don't necessarily need the butterflies, and the awkward first kisses can willingly be a thing of the past..

as a woman, one assumes that the male does not feel or think like all of those love songs out there...but then again...the best songs are the ones where it's from a guys point of view. it evokes the "i wonder what he thinks" or "does he feel the same" or in most cases "no way a dude wrote this" [insert judgement here]

i know personally, distance is difficult, but where there is a will there is a way. with that being said, i want the edge, i want the umph, the sparkles and the shimmer. these things are all possible. trust me, i know, as do the lucky ones at one point or another. on the same topic, i love watching those who have umph... i horribly enough compare my life with the other...insert lesson here; never, ever do that. ever.

moving on...anyway, i am thankful for knowing what love is, feeling it and wanting it..but aching for it can be tough. really, aching for it.. the irritable, grumpy kind of ache. trust me, it's no fun. it sparks frustration, anger and jealousy. and well, mom always told me that green isn't my color. at all. but see, its not jealous in a negative way. (and i think i look good in green) its an anxious way, an "i want that" kind of way... so hey, maybe its the holidays, maybe its the mimosas, or welp...maybe its just that.. its the ache. here's to the flying of a few weeks.. because the holidays are better with company, and well.. at the Webster's, a stiff drink.